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SHOW YOUR GOLD (AND TAIL FEATHERS)

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For lack of a decent sample size, we can't say for certain that Vanderbilt is the best dancing football unit in the SEC. We have no visual data on Auburn's dancing ability, though we suspect Trooper Taylor is dancing, and it is with your mother, and she is not complaining. Nor will we ever have footage of the Alabama football team dancing with their coaches, because Alabama football is not fun, and never will be. They dance only at gunpoint, perhaps for Nick Saban's amusement.

For the moment, though, the Vanderbilt Commodores are in the lead.


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