LIFELONG GAMECOCKS FAN TO MAKE PICKS ON GAMEDAY
PLEASE ASSIST THEM IN THIS IMPORTANT FIGHT. Noted vampiric sports louse/gimp Kenny Chesney will be the guest picker at South Carolina because he is a lifelong fan of the South Carolina Gamecocks and at least twenty other teams. He likes sports, and teams, and winning, and also being on camera wearing sports gear. When asked for comment, Chesney replied "Sports, and margaritas. Two for one margaritas on the beach with my baby. Trucks."
Anyway, help Garnet and Black Attack fight this menace however you can, and if you are there in person boo this man. Boo him mercilessly and without ceasing.
THERE IS ACTUAL FOOTBALL ON TONIGHT. And because it's four teams who enjoy scoring, that probably means no less than seven hours of it, starting with Texas Tech/Oklahoma State in T. Boone's natural gas fantasia bowl of a stadium. Oklahoma State seems modestly confident; Texas Tech should be a bit nervous after getting rolled by Arkansas and losing a defensive coordinator, but hey, have an empty post corner anyway.
ACTUAL FOOTBALL, CONT'D. The late show is UCLA at Arizona State, a game where both teams are playing with their second-string QBs. House of Sparky's feeling chippy, and why the hell not when you're playing at home against a team that struggled with Memphis late. They're also staging their own anti-celebrity protest, one we support with equal fervor.
WHY ARE YOU SUPPORTING STUPID LAWS. Sure, Charlie, test your players for weed aggressively. Your loss for absolutely fucking nothing in return. Remember: every time a first year coach heats up the drug-testing regimen it's not really to enforce a stupid law, but to catch the dudes who he wants off the team anyway. (Charlie's a good coach, this is a dumb rule, and legalize weed so we can stop doing this shit.)
OH HEY. ESPN suspends someone after they asked to be suspended.
ETC: WE GET BUN B ON FRIDAY OMG WE MIGHT GET INTERNATIONAL PLAYERS ANTHEM WITH THE GHOST OF PIMP C SHOWING UP