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A SOCIETY OUT OF BALANCE ATTENDS A SPRING GAME
WAS THERE ANYTHING ELSE TO DO IN COLUMBUS ON SATURDAY? WE ANSWER THE IMPORTANT QUESTIONSOhio State drew nearly 100,000 for a scrimmage in April. This should not be a source of pride - it's an alarming...
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EDSBS BOWL CHARITY UPDATE (AND THE ONLY THING WE LEARNED IN SPRING)
GO DAWGS AND PLEASE SOMEONE ELSE WRITE A BIG CHECK WE CAN'T LIVE WITH THIS The EDSBS Charity Bowl is underway. Donate here frequently for best results. We learned very little from spring practice. For...
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NICK SABAN TEARING UP THE ROAD IN A LIFELIKE MERCEDES
THEY EVEN GOT THE SCALE RIGHT!Man, look at him go! He's DESTROYING that carpet. THOSE GERMANS CAN MAKE ANYTHING.
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THOUGHT EXPERIMENT: LET'S BITE ON A RUMOR ABOUT BRAXTON MILLER
THE LAST THING YOU SHOULD DO IS RUMORMONGERING, BUT IT'S THE LAST PART OF THE DAY SO LET'S GOThe EDSBS Charity Bowl is going on and closing in on $15K, aka halfway to us getting that elusive tattoo...
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MACK BROWN GOES TO DUBAI
WE DON'T WANT THESE POWERS BUT WE HAVE THEMTHE EDSBS CHARITY BOWL IS STILL ON. GIVE YOUR MONEY TO A GOOD CHARITY. GIVE IT NOW. We've been joking about this for two or three years now: ahahaha, look,...
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SPURRIER'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY: AN OUTLINE
AN EDSBS EXCLUSIVEToday, the Atlanta Journal-Constitution revealed that Steve Spurrier is working on his autobiography with author Buddy Martin, with the finished product expected to be published in...
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THE MC CONGRATULATES AL GOLDEN ON A SUCCESSFUL DRAFT
THE BEST COLLECTION OF TALENT TO GO 6-7 IN YEARSMiami had two first round picks in the NFL Draft last night, the first time since 2008. Let's see what Al Golden's various faces think of that.Two...
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The Talladega checklist
Spencer Hall found everything on his Talladega Checklist, including sunburns and pitbulls.1. Pitbull in a pickup truck: checkAt 8:30 a.m. CT, the Waffle House at exit #168 off I-20 in Alabama isn't...
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THE MC DETAILS CARDALE JONES' ATTENTION TO DETAIL
IT'S NOT A ME-FIRST PHONE, IT'S A DETAIL SHOWING TRUE ATTENTION TO THE LITTLE THINGS It's levels to this swagg ish pic.twitter.com/5dolm8almv — Cardale Jones (@CJ12_) May 5, 2015Cardale Jones, let us...
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ERASE THIS GAME: USF 23, NOTRE DAME 20
PURPLE FACE, PURPLE FACE / I ONLY WANT TO SEE YOU YELLING WITH YOUR PURPLE FACESkip Holtz's tenure at USF featured a rich series of lows followed by even richer, more abysmal purgatorial lows.To wit:...
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THE MC SAYS STOP USING LAME BIKINI PHOTOSHOPS
OR WE WILL NOT STOP PHOTOSHOPPING PITT COACHES INTO PERSONAL AREASEDSBS CHARITY BOWL HOME STRETCH DONATE HERE AND BE AWESOME AND MAYBE HELP US GET A DISFIGURING BIG TEN-THEMED TATTOOHe's already...
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THE MC IS GETTING A TATTOO
THE RESULTS ARE IN, AND MICHIGAN REIGNS AGAIN LSU did not win the EDSBS Charity Bowl, and that's fine. They have other things going on, like going bankrupt as an institution thanks to a heady blend of...
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SHUTDOWN FULLCAST BACK! THE DRAFT AND FAST FOOD EPISODE
THE FIRST EPISODE OF SEASON THREE BASICALLY OPENS THE COLLEGE FOOTBALL SEASON The Shutdown Fullcast returns and basically opens the college football season for everyone. Congratulations, everyone: It's...
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THE MC ASKS JOAKIM NOAH TO WATCH A FOOTBALL GAME
IT'S BEEN A WHILE, FAIR ALIEN FRIEND Noah on bench watching Cardale Jones on the public address mic mouthed, "you ain't in the SEC" — Anthony Lima (@SportsBoyTony) May 7, 2015It might not be fair to...
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THE MC PLAYS "WHERE IS EVERETT GOLSON"
AMERICA'S NEW FAVORITE KIDS BOOK ASKS KIDS TO FIND THE TRANSFERRING QB Where is Everett GolsonWherever can he be?Is he in South CarolinaTeeing off with OBC?Is he down in TuscaloosaWith Lane Kiffin and...
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The hour of the NBA goon is nigh
Every team needs a goon to advance in the NBA Playoffs. The Warriors had theirs all along.That first round of the NBA playoffs is something spectacular, really: players of exceptional talent pitted...
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SHUTDOWN FULLCAST 3.2: WHERE BOBBY BOWDEN IS FOGHORN LEGHORN
THE PODCAST WHERE ONE OF US DESCRIBES THEMSELVES AS "SO SEXUAL" This week's Shutdown Fullcast covers a veritable panoply of important topics including ACTUAL COLLEGE FOOTBALL. The menu includes:A super...
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THE MC GOES LIMITLESS WITH BRET BIELEMA
A GREAT HAWG MUST MAKE A STY OF THE WHOLE WORLD Here I am getting ready to kill these cancer cells just after viewing them under a microscope #CureCancer#WoooPigpic.twitter.com/438Xd7X2Mh — Bret...
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MAD MAX IS A MOVIE MADE WITH CAPS LOCK ON
YOU WILL NOT BE ABLE TO STOP TALKING LIKE THIS AFTER SEEING MAD MAX: FURY ROADThis is a non-review of Mad Max: Fury Road. It, by definition, has to be in all-capsYOU KNOW, HERE IS THE THING ABOUT MAD...
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CONNOR HALLIDAY IS DONE AND THAT'S A HAPPY ENDING
SISYPHUS THE QUARTERBACK Ole Miss had just upended LSU in Oxford in 2013 and it was a Pac-12 kind of late and we were watching the Pac-12 late game: Washington State at Oregon, a game kicking off at...
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