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JONATHAN TAYLOR, ALABAMA, AND A LOSS FOR WORDS
A DEPRESSING NOTE ABOUT A DEPRESSING THINGThat's my favorite question Holly asks here in a long list of unanswered questions: why the hell did Alabama even bother with Jonathan Taylor in the first...
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THE MC ASKS IF GEORGE WHITFIELD UNDERSTAND BROOMS
OR CLEANING PRODUCTS AT ALLGeorge Whitfield, why are you doing that. It's a broom. Do you understand anything about cleaning products at all. You are allegedly pretty good at preparing college QBs for...
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Which sports people could you beat in a fight?
We asked the Internet what sporting people you could win a fight with. Most of you lied.If you're like me, the first thing you do when you walk into a room is figure out who you're going to have to...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL SAYS WE'RE JUST GOING TO HAVE TO WORK WITH YOU
YOU'LL HAVE TO DO UNTIL REINFORCEMENTS SHOW UPSpring practice is fun because generally coaches are in heavy dad mode, and as we've noted elsewhere, there are so many different kinds of dads in this...
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Golf Digest can't stop putting topless golfers on its covers
Dear Golf Digest:This is a cover, I guess. It has a woman wearing a towel, golfer Lexi Thompson, as the magazine's cover for their "fitness and power" issue.I landed on the May cover of @GolfDigest !...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL RESPONDS TO WILL MUSCHAMP
NAMASTEWill Muschamp was asked this evening about Jim McElwain's remarks about UF's roster being "really insufficient" in some areas. (1/2) — Tom Green (@Tomas_Verde) April 3, 2015(2/2) Muschamp hadn't...
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A SPONSORED MESSAGE FROM KENTUCKY FOOTBALL
THERE'S NEVER A BETTER TIME THAN THE PRESENT Hello, friend. Is this a bad time?Stop, and let me answer that question for you: there is no bad time to purchase your season tickets for 2015 Kentucky...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL SCOUTS A BODYSLAM
A FAIR BUT ENTHUSIASTIC SCOUTING REPORT OF THE MAN WHO BODYSLAMMED PLIES1. Okay, so this is a stationary target, and maybe not the best example for someone looking to scout a possible tackler. Also we...
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WILL MUSCHAMP AS A GIGGLING MAN SPEAKING SPANISH
"HERE IS YOUR TRASH, GAINESVILLE!" All of this is completely accurate in every way and THAT'S THE BEST PART. IT'S JUST THE BEST PART OF THIS MAN CACKLING HIS ASS OFF AND JUST LISTING FACTS ABOUT THE...
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The 11 best things at the Masters, ranked
Sorting through the top players, plants, and fans after spending the first round at Augusta.1. Miguel Angel Jimenez. THE GAWD. I don't even know what he shot while I was following him because he...
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The 11 best things at the Masters, Sunday edition
Sorting through the best sandwiches, insects and glutes during the final round at Augusta.1. Miguel Angel Jimenez. Not even playing and still dominating the charts.1a. Egg Salad Sandwich. Make all the...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL BIDS DR. LOU FAREWELL
IT MEANS HARD WOOD, MANHe is 78, an age when you usually only appear on television with the words "Missing" or "Chinese Premier" under you name. But Lou Holtz is leaving ESPN on a high note--namely...
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Augusta National is a fake Southern wonderland inspired by trench warfare
Spencer Hall went to Augusta National, the world's best imitation of a real placeI. A respectable corporate office building's worth of hillsOld dudes openly consider calling the EMS cart to get back up...
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MASTERS OUTTAKE: LEAVE SPURRIER ALONE
HE JUST LOOKED SO HAPPY So we went to the Masters this weekend (and after what we just wrote, probably won't be invited back as credentialed media.) It went about as well as you could imagine that...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL CALLS THE PLAY
GIVE BRIAN KELLY YOUR PLAYS IMMEDIATELYYOU CAN CALL A PLAY FOR NOTRE DAME. It only makes sense to let literally anyone call a play for the Fighting Irish, as Notre Dame has hired Charlie Weis, Ty...
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DID THIS ANIMAL HAVE A BETTER LIFE THAN YOU?
NO THAT PICTURE IS NOT OF THE ACTUAL HORSE BECAUSE HE WAS NOT INFLATABLE BUT NOW HE IS IN HEAVEN WITH ALL THE OTHER HORSES AND ANIMALS THAT HAD TO WATCH RUTGERS FOOTBALL IN THE 1990sPROPOSED: Lord...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL CRACKS THE VANDAL CODE
THIS IS A MESSAGE FROM COLLEGE FOOTBALL'S REAL POWERBROKER(image via r/cfb )SEE THE SIGNS. You might think this is a simple piece of vandalism, perpetrated by a Michigan fan against the Spartan statue...
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How to train your Hellcat
Spencer Hall drove a Dodge Challenger SRT Hellcat around for a week. You can try to train this car, but it's still going to be a beast.How did you get a 2015 Dodge Challenger SRT Hellcat?I was afraid I...
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THE MORNING CONSTITUTIONAL OPENS THE EDSBS CHARITY BOWL
IT'S TIME TO GIVE IN THE NAME OF HUMILIATING YOUR RIVAL. AGAIN. GOOD MORNING. It's that time of year, where we justify our existence as a useless-by-design college football site by raising money for a...
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